Happy new month y’all..
So, a girl turned a year older the other day; on June 1st to be precise and if I say I have learnt to much the past one year, it might sound cliché from here to high heavens. They say you should strive to learn something from every situation and moreso learn something new every day. Every day I look back and literally ask myself what I have accomplished and however small it is; I always make sure I part myself on the back for it. Don’t worry though; I aint planning to bore you with the details of what I have learned in the past one year.
Y’all know I aint a birthday party person especially if it is my birthday but I always make sure to do something nice for yours truly cus self-love is the most important love ya know J. So, when the royal wedding was happening and The Lord Erroll was hosting a high tea party cum wedding watching, my girl Shi and I had an aha moment and thought we could make it my special treat for turning a year older. It’s quite an achievement to turn a year older these days ya know; with all the water accidents, stray bullets, irate spouses, huge national debts and stuff, be thankful for each day you wake up and go to bed alright.
To tell you the truth, I haven’t been so excited about anything in the near past and my every waking moment was spent looking forward to the day. My sister in-law had gifted me a dress that wouldn’t fit her cus it was too big for her; it was also too big for me and I needed it fixed so that it could fit me. Sometimes being small bodied comes at a price but hey; I aint complaining. We had bought fascinators cus being extra is our hobby, haha! Unfortunately, we couldn’t find gloves to finish the look but now that we look back, that extra extra wouldn’t have looked good ya know. It would have reeked shagmodoz vibes from here to kingdom comes.
I kept reminding Shi to make a reservation at The Lord Erroll for us cus if she would have forgotten I wouldn’t have forgiven her; the way her amnesia is set up, eeh, let’s not even talk about it. Yeah, you have to make a reservation atleast 12 hours prior. Tea is served between 3 p.m. and 6 p.m. but outta excitement and stuff, we showed up 30 minutes earlier and we took the 30 minutes or so to take photos and stuff before the tea was served. Also, there’s no public transport, you have to take a taxi if you don’t have a car to get you there (it is Runda we are talking about, so yeah).
The portions (pastries) are quite generous and you can take as much tea or coffee but you can only take too much of it you know. I don’t know if its cus we’ve been having wheaty stuff all week as our snacks but let’s just day I took enough wheat (pastries) to last me a whole year, haha! I’m planning to ditch wheat for the next few weeks cus eeer, I just cant stand it now.
They say you should use money to get used to it (tumia pesa ikuzoee); I could get used to the ambience at The Lord Erroll. There’s just something about the calmness, the green plants, the small water ponds, the small fountain at the reception and the friendly staff that can make you forget all your troubles, LOL! I haven’t said so many ‘thank yous’ in such a long time he he. At some point they placed napkins on our laps and as Shi put it a few days later, she almost asked whether the extra service and politeness was going to cost us some extra money. In an era where good service is almost becoming rare, their service was quite baffling if I may say so. I am looking forward to going there one more time just to soak in the awesomeness.
Did I also say, we asked the manager to take a few photos of us and he was glad to do it? Yes, he was all glad to do it and although the lighting was kinda off, he took some awesome shots. However, I was just awkward with photos on this particular day and eeer, mine didn’t come out nicely. All the same; they are just meant for my eyes to show my grandkids that I used to have a life back then, haha! I wonder what apps they will have discovered by the time I am using a walking stick; I think we have seen pretty much everything in terms technology.
I guess I am getting rusty with my grammar; my writing hiatus is not doing me any good. Please bear with any grammatical errors you might encounter here.
Have a productive month
For Geminis, its a birthday month, so I am still celebrating until the month ends
PS: This post was supposed to go live 2 weeks ago; see my life
Do you know putting an effort to look good elevates your mood and your self-esteem goes a notch higher? I thought you should know. The other day I realized I have not been putting an effort to look good. Lately I have been a little demotivated with stuff as much as I have been reading and listening to motivational stuff. I have also learnt something; unless you put in the work in thinking positively, no amount of motivational material will make your situation better. You just have to listen or read and actually practice what you grasped from whatever your mind was consuming.
In the last one or two weeks I started putting an effort to putting on a little make-up and I am always proud of the results. I have never been a make-up person and no this statement is not meant to make me look special; I just have never been bothered but thanks to YouTube, I can now fix my own eyebrows, well almost. I have these very bad dark rings around my eyes that I cant seem to shake off cus I try to get enough sleep every day; they just won’t go away. Well to be honest, I haven’t been bothered to try anything to ‘treat’ them. I have a live aloe vera plant on my balcony but I cant be bothered to apply the juice never mind I religiously water the said plant; apparently it helps to remove the dark rings. I also bought some coconut oil that apparently helps to keep ‘em dark rings at bay but I wont be bothered to apply some when going to bed. Clearly, I haven’t put in any effort to help my face.
So the other day, I wanted a photoshoot for my birthday cus birthdays come once a year and I asked my friend if they know an awesome photographer and she just happened to know the right guy. Initially I wanted a ‘studio’ photoshoot but she recommended an outdoors one and I thought, why not?
We met the photographers 2 hours after the arranged time cus we cant keep time to save our necks; we almost bailed out. I am a thrift shopper and I had carried my three thrifted outfits and a cute maroon dress that my friend got me in UK. I paired the dress with red-bordering orange heels that I put on with almost everything else in my closet, Lord I need more shoes in my closet!
This was quite a bold move cus I have always thought maroon and red bordering orange( I seriously do not know what color this pair of shoes is) don’t go together but well, color blocking be our saving grace he he. I also had this very cute black fascinator that gave the look a totally different vibe.
When the photos were delivered I just could not get enough of myself! The feel good hormones were having a field day and I thought to myself, damn girl, you could be feeling this good every day but you won’t be bothered to put in a little effort.
So I have made a little promise to myself, that I will make an effort to look good. I don’t have to be in heels every day cus they can be quite overwhelming but I’ll make an effort to look presentable and like I gave two hoots about my look. I am ashamed to say that I never plan my work outfits for the next day. I just wake up and pick the one that does not need ironing; so long as I aint naked or in torn clothes, I am good to go; it’s a new month (a new year for me-birthday and stuff) and I’m about to change that. Have a look and let me know what you think J
Sooooo, I went thrift shopping sometimes early this year and got myself these flowered pants. I thought I’d wear them to work as a dress down Fridays outfit but I ended up making them my church pants because awesome is an understatement!
I still wear them to work once in a blue moon but they are better worn on weekends (Saturday and Sunday).
I bought a lime green blazer to pair with ’em pants but turns out my color blindness was working overtime cus there’s no lime green on these pants,haha! So I have a lime green blazer in my closet that I am yet to wear because, it needs to be fixed a little so that it can fit me. The one reason that’s keeping me from wearing my lime green blazer is my laziness; I just have a weakness of taking my clothes to be fixed. I have more dresses that need to be fixed but I just never get the time to take them to a fundi, Sigh!
I was lucky enough to get me a blue blazer that I have been wearing with everything and anything cus its just so versatile(I have always wanted to use versatile on my articles :-D). I pair it(the blue blazer) with my black pants and skirts, my yellow dress, my white dresses, my red dress and now my flowered pants; even this one ‘goes’ well with the blue blazer….
I paired with with some cream vest but i guess a white vest works better and black stilletos
It is exactly 1:15 a.m. in the wee hours of a Monday morning and no I am not insomniac; I have my days though but it is a once in a while kinda thing. So, why am up this very late or very early in the morning depending on how you look at the situation? So, someone tried meeting their Maker this evening but I have a feeling January still wants her here cus we are all in this Njaaanuary misery together. Why would anyone want to die in such a painful manner you ask? I am glad you asked; they had a fight with le hubby and she thought the best way to get back at him is by committing suicide. So, they were fighting from the bedroom of course and the heat became too much so they decided to take it to the back balcony. After the final punch, nigga goes back to the bedroom and the missus decides to hang herself.
What I don’t understand is how or where she got the rope to hang herself or she had been harboring suicidal thoughts all along and she waited for the perfect moment to execute her perfect plan. Unfortunately the universe had better plans cus someone saw her just in the nick of time and called for help and who better to come for help than le hubby himself. Out of panic he just cut the rope without a second thought and the missus came tumbling down from the second floor to a hard verandah where passersby helped to remove the rope from her neck and rushed her to the hospital.
This happened too fast and I only got the full information waaaaaay after she had been rushed to the hospital. However, I had heard the whole commotion though all along I thought I was dreaming cus I had taken some tablets ( a girl been nursing a mild flu and these tablets are sleep inducing) . Then again, I thought they were muggers and she got caught up in the mayhem since I heard her say, “Mwangi nitoe kamba” (“Mwangi please remove the rope from my neck”)after a loud scream. I am one very angry person right now because I am supposed to be seated at my desk at work at 8 in the morning and I am here jotting this down because, insomnia happened. Had those people not messed up my sleep I would not be here writing this trying to beg sleep to come.
Someone joked that getting married nowadays is like driving past the Salgaa blackspot cus it is anytime you meet your Maker. We all laughed at the not so funny joke but this is very true; if people are not committing suicide from marital frustrations, le husbands or the wives are killing them in cold blood. Every new day there’s a case of a husband killing his wife or a husband killing the whole family and then committing suicide. And this is just a scratch on the surface since the ones we see on TV or read from the newspapers are the few cases that get media coverage. What about those ones that happen in the middle of Shomakhokho (sp) or in the interiors of Turkana County and no one came forward to report or bring it to the media’s attention?
The saddest thing is that we have normalized this whole thing; we just rant on Facebook for a few days or Twitter typing RIP and later go back to our lives like sh*t didn’t go down. Not a day passes without a domestic violence case being reported or being aired on TV or Radio; if you ask me, the situation is getting out of hand. The fast we get the situation sorted, the better because the number of children being left orphaned is increasing. I mean orphaned cus, when one parent kills the other and the remaining parent ends up in jail for murder, aren’t those kids practically orphans cus none of their parents is in their lives? Let us not even talk about the resulting emotional damage in the poor kids. Let us not even talk about how the poor kids will end up in cruel hands of relatives and when poop hits the fan and they cant take it anymore, they end up in streets being muggers and all sorts of nuisance to the society and later maybe felled by a bullet.
Out of all this I have concluded that most people are frustrated with life and what better way to deal with their frustration than to mete it on their spouses. It is too bad that the children and the rest of the extended family are caught up in the mayhem.
So, what are you doing about the situation? Most of us will just sit comfortably in our office chairs or wherever it is that you work and blame the victim for days on end on why they didn’t run when the spouse started emotional abuse. But have you been to Kilimani mums lately or have you been on these Facebook streets and read how most humans will blame the victim? Y’all ask stupid questions about what they did to deserve such a beating or why the husband arranged for her to be raped and later her body doused in acid? Others say she was a mpango wa kando and she deserved it cus she’s a home wrecker and all sorts of BS that irk me from here to kingdom comes. Other people will urge the woman to stay on since he was a first time offender and the good book says we should forgive and blah blah blah….
Lest y’all forget, not a day passes without someone attacking single mothers (calms your titties, this is not about single mums only) and how they cannot keep a man. Those single mothers you are out there bad mouthing loved themselves and the lives of their kids more than they loved the idea of marriage. They loved their sanity more than the title Mrs. I am still single and hoping to get married someday but this Salgaa joke is starting to get me scared cuss h*t is true! Knowing that there’s only a very thin line between love and hate and life and death makes me wanna spend the rest of my life loving my son and I.
You get married to a psycho you are doomed, you choose to remain single for sanity’s sake, you cant live in peace courtesy of married humans who think marriage is the alpha and omega of this life. THERE’S JUST NO WINNING IN THIS LIFE! So, where was I? I was saying, the society still considers one a failure if they cant sustain a marriage and this is especially blamed on women. It is even sadder that it is women who keep slut shaming fellow women for not sticking in an abusive relationship. The man is always a saint in most women’s eyes and it must be le wife who was a problem in the said relationship.
If y’all cant stand each other, what is easier, walking away or receiving daily death threats? Or watching your kids slowly get emotionally damaged every time y’all throwing punches and cooking pans in the house. Y’all need to choose your lives as opposed to a silly title that might cost you your life and that of your kids; you can live without the said spouse cus you were still living even before they became a part of your life. Forget the marriage vows, heaven will understand; I am sure that is why you have wisdom to know when to walk away and when to stick around.
If it is not working why don’t you just walk away before it is too late? Don’t listen to those saying marriage needs patience and tolerance, I don’t know kuvumilia when the said person keeps on saying they will kill you one day. As much as the good book says love is tolerant, I don’t believe in ‘treating’ black eyes cus someone made me their punching bag or washing my pillow cases daily from daily tears, hell nah! There’s better to life than daily tears from a person who’s not even related to you by blood.
Y’all need to love yourselves, something we never get to grasp. When you love yourself so much, you will find it hard to put up with some of these things. And I know y’all rolling your eyes saying I should get married first then I can talk about marriage. I have been on this earth long enough to know things I can never put up with and the ones I can tolerate. They say when you know your value, you will learn to treat yourself better and demand better treatment from others; men and women. We all know even women are not saints and they have also driven their husbands to their death plunges.
So, know what works for you and what you can’t put up with. Also, before you put that rope around your neck because a your spouse said or did 1,2,3 things, have you thought about how your kids will live after you are dead. Before you pull that trigger or throw that punch that will send them to their Maker, have you thought about your kids? Of course you didn’t, cus y’all too selfish to think about others (story for another day).
What is the church doing about domestic violence nowadays? What are you doing as a church group leader? Do people still attend pre-marital classes organized by churches? As a church leader, do you arrange for marriage seminars every now and then? Do you have a marriage counselor in church where troubled couples can walk in without the fear or exorbitant charges they might need to fork out? Are you turning away single parents away cus they are not a complete family?
Does your school turn away kids from single parent homes cus they don’t come from a complete family and they might ‘infect’ the other with whatever? What are you doing as an individual about domestic violence? Just sitting there bad mouthing your neighbor and making sure they know how much of a failure they are cus they cant keep their marriage together? What are you doing as the married person in that violent relationship? Do you have a hand in enabling it continue by staying on hoping they will change?
What are doing as a law enforcement officer when someone reports a domestic violence case? Do you make fun of their misery? Do you accept bribes from the abuser so that you can release them? Do you issue P3 forms as fast as possible or do you first ask for a bribe before you can issue it? What are you doing as a doctor treating the domestic violence victim? Do you accept bribes from the abuser to get them off the hook by writing what they want you to write? You know by doing that you are enabling the abuser to continue doing it, right?
As a parent, when your daughter comes back to your house after a series of abuses, do you make them feel like a failure? Do you make them feel like a burden to you? Did you push them to get married to that person cus they were monied and your selfish needs came before the needs of your child. Do you keep accepting bribes from your son-in-law every time your daughter comes home after being abused and you still allow her to go back to the slaughter house she calls a marriage? Do you listen to your in-laws more than you listen to your child? Do you keep telling your daughter to put up since you also put up with it and you are still alive as they can see?
What are the Women Reps doing about domestic violence, women MPs, women leaders at large? The rate at which things are escalating, domestic violence should be declared a national disaster or there should be state of emergency about the same.THIS IS GETTING OUT OF HAND!
What is your contribution in all this domestic violence issue? What are you doing about it? These are the million dollar questions we all need to answer and maybe, just maybe, we will have better homes and an even happier society. I still don’t understand why Uhuru Kenyatta didn’t create a Happiness Ministry and get us a CS for that post. It’d have come in handy now that we are all employing our spouses to make us happy.
Also, this is not how I had imagined my first post of 2018 will be but eeer, somebody gotta put it out there, right? And this post was signed off at 3:15 a.m, I am now sleepy.
The year is ending in a few days; I don’t know whether I am excited cus I’ll get to write down the same ol’ New Year resolutions or I am disappointed cus my last year’s resolutions never saw the light of day. Wait, did I even have New Year Resolutions? I honestly don’t remember, lame huh?! Anyway, for the longest time, I don’t do New Year resolutions cus let’s face it, consistency and I don’t appear on the same sentence. I struggle so much to do things consistently. Maybe that’s why I am a low-key failure in a lot of things. Anyway, they say you cant do the same thing over and over and keep expecting different results; cliché I now but I am hoping to try something new this coming new year.
I am going to write my goals aka aspirations in a ‘tablet’ aka a dream board and everyday I’ll look at them and see how far I am from achieving the goal. Even the Bible says we should write down our visions; there’s power in putting stuff down on paper. They make take time to happen but they’ll surely happen. Habakkuk 2:2-3 And the Lord answered me: “Write the vision; make it plain on tablets, so he may run who reads it. For still the vision awaits its appointed time; it hastens to the end—it will not lie. If it seems slow, wait for it; it will surely come; it will not delay.
In the last few years I have come to learn that it is just not about writing your visions; it all depends with your commitment and your motivation towards the said goal(s). I have printed a few papers that contain something I want to accomplish in the long run but sometimes I look at them and feel nothing. Each of the fours printouts have been placed strategically such that when I am on my bed, I can look up and see one(its placed on the ‘ceiling’), one on the door, one on the wall and one inside my closet. I kid you not, sometimes I don’t see them other times I see them and feel nothing; yet other times I’ll see them and actually think about them but I’ll be too unbothered to do sh*t. So, yes, you can have a goal, put it down on paper and even print out the paper but without self motivation, you will do nothing.
I have also learnt that you don’t have to make a list of your goals/aspirations at the tick of the clock at 11:59 p.m. on that day. You can make them as need arises; when something shifts in your life and you decide, mmhh, I can fly with this one. Don’t limit your mind to making them at the start of the year; you can make them even on November, one month to the end of the year and still accomplish them. If I told you I had not thought about going up Mt. Longonot at the start of the year, would you believe me? If I told you I had never thought of starting a YouTube channel all my life, would you believe me? If I told you I have never thought about affiliate marketing, would you believe me? Look at me now; with an experience of a lifetime; hiking Mt. Longonot. Look at me now; with a YouTube Channel and an affiliate blog. They are not where I would love them to be in terms of content because inconsistency happens but I know I am getting there. You get the drift though; just start whenever the bug bites you. The most important thing is for you to get to the end result; it doesn’t matter when you start, what matters is the end result.
The good thing about this life is that every day, every week, every month, every year is a chance to make all the wrongs right. It is a chance to start afresh; easier said than done but for a person who’s still learning the power of positive thinking (read me), the possibilities are endless!
To tell you the truth I have learnt so many things in the last one year and specifically the last half of the year than I have learnt in my entire 30 years. Yes, I know it sounds cliché from here to Timbuktu but the good Lord knows I have gained so much wisdom.
Am I proud of my achievements? Yes of course, duuuuh! Am I mad at self cus I made a whole lot of stupid mistakes? No, cus guess what; I would not have learnt a thing if everything was all smooth. Sigh! This whole post sounds so cliché but every single sentence resonates with my situation right now it is ridiculous!
Happy New Year! Yes, I know its too early but I just want to be the first to wish you good tidings.
I don’t know how to make it sound like a sigh of ‘it’s been quite some time since we were here* but we are back here now. I know I need to up my consistency game cus lets face it, I cant be consistent to save my neck. Anyway, I trust you have been well and I’m going to try and be consistent for the next few weeks even if it is the only thing I’ll accomplish before the year ends. I will try and do two posts per week, so help me God!
So, sometimes back I went for a team building event never mind we don’t work in the same company; it was the first time I met some of those people, well, minus the event organizers. There were many activities but one event got me thinking the other day and it was the inspiration behind this post. We were grouped into three and two people were to stand facing each other while the middle one would have their back to one of the two..Does it make sense though 😀 ?
The catch was to have the middle one swing back and forth; completely letting themselves go hoping the person behind or the person in front would catch them lest they fall. The other catch was to have your eyes closed, your hands across your chest and not move your foot in front to act as a balance; just let yourself go and the other person will catch you.
I was my turn to be in the middle and no matter how much I tried to let myself go cus I knew the other person would be there to catch me, I just could not. I would either open my eyes or I will put my feet in such a way that I’ll still support myself by the time I am landing in their arms. For starters, this behavior is for a person with trust issues, hahaha! Secondly, this is a person who still wants to be in control even after being assured that there is a person or persons in control.
So the other day I remembered that team building event and I realized how we don’t trust God will work out things for us even after He has assured us over and over again He will not let out feet slip. He has told us over and over again not to be afraid but we will pray and still try to take control over things. We are all human and we will still want to have our hands on stuff just to make sure things go well but maybe its time we let go of our fears. Its time we let God take control and just wait for things to work out cus eventually they will work at some point.
So, trust God and lean not on your own understanding; God has your back, quite literally! Just surrender and let Him work out things for you. You prayed in faith that things will work out, just trust that your prayers were heard and at His appointed time, things will definitely work out.
It’s time to take my own advice cus I worry too much!
How many times have you told yourself or anyone who cares to listen that you cant do A,B,C,D because of 1,2,3 reasons? How many times has that self limiting belief lost you a couple of life changing chances? A lot, right?
So, for the longest time I keep telling myself I cant wear multicolored pants or even skirts and what has that belief got me? Over 10 pairs of black pants and other dull colors like brown. Let’s not even get started on how I don’t have even one flowered dress. Lets not even talk about how I just recently started buying colored tops; my colors were black, brown and navy blue; never mind I tell everyone who cares to listen of how my favorite color is baby blue. Lets not even talk about of how I only have three baby blue outfits in my closet.
You must be thinking this is one weirdo of a lady. I had started believing in that weirdness until a friend’s flowered pants couldn’t fit her and her being almost the same size as yours truly, the flowered pants ended up in my closet. Initially I had bought a top that would perfectly match with that flowered pants and its like the good Lord had directed me to buy that top, hahaha!
It however took me almost 2 months to put on that outfit cus I had reasons from here to kingdom comes as to why I could not put it on. For starters, I thought it was too flowered and too screaming for a ‘work’ outfit. Secondly, that Sunday that I purpose to put it on, I just don’t have the energy to strut in heels and that is how I end up in another outfit. I have put on an outfit two times in a week because of that shoes excuse, yeup! I kid you not!
So this last Sunday I purposed come rain come shine, I must put on this outfit! And that’s how I could not get enough of myself the whole day!
So, be open to change and ideas; you never know what you are missing out in these streets cus you cant put on a yellow and white polka dotted top.
Just for the record, everything in this look is thrifted J
Cheers to more MY STYLE POSTS
Here’s your’s truly 🙂
Also, Weekend vlog
So, the other day I stumbled on a video of two girls and according to the comments, one of the girls had ‘snatched’ the boyfriend of the other. So, they were fighting and for some weird reason I watched the video to the end something I normally don’t do. The ‘snatcher’ had braids and the other one had short hair so it was easy for her to overpower the snatcher cus she’d drag her on the floor by her hair. Y’all know how painful that can get. Let’s not even imagine the braids could have been freshly done, Issapainmygirls
At some point the snatcher was stabbed on her thighs with a pair of scissors that had been to cut her hair, Lord! The things I’ll see on this internet. So, it got me thinking, if I was that man these girls were fighting over and my girl stabbed or did evil things to the other girl, maaan, I would dump her like yesterday! For starters, that is a person capable of stabbing you in your sleep if you so much uttered another girl’s name. That’s a dangerous person, a person that won’t feel anything butchering you in cold blood and continue sleeping like nothing happened. Such are the kind that scald their husbands in their sleep and leave them for dead or those people from you know where (those that destroy the family jewels). That is not love, it is obsession and y’all know an obsessed psycho is worse than a wounded lion.
I might be one of those nice girls that finish the last but I’d never lift a finger to fight another woman cus he snatched my man. For starters, a man is never snatched; I mean, he is not a purse or a handbag or just something that can be wriggled out of your hand. The ‘snatchee’ agreed to get into the trap with his eyes wide open and at some point he might have told the snatcher that he is single. What do you do if he swears by his mother that he is single? Si you fall for him. Anyway, that is not reason enough to fall for a married, engaged or a dating man. Women have a 6th sense, cliché or not and if your gut tells you he’s hooked somewhere else, trust your instincts, he sure is hooked. In such a case, engage your Sherlock Holmes skills and dig every little detail you can get your hands on. This is not about nabbing that man in his shenanigans ; it is about how to be the other woman if you decide to go down that route;
- Make sure your hair is short at all times in case the missus gets hold of you. Also, never wear dangling earring especially loops incase the missus shows up unexpectedly and you don’t have time to remove them.
- Make sure you are stronger than the missus just in case a fight ensues. You can’t be on the wrong and still not have the energy to defend you, pick a struggle girl!
- Never make your presence known to the missus. Don’t text or call the missus with an intention of taunting her. Maybe she even knows you exist and she’s strategizing on how to deal with the both of you. So, lie low like an envelope. You decided to put asunder what God has put together, live with the insignificance and live in the shadows like it was meant to be.
- In case the missus gets hold of your a** and you think fighting back is the best option, think twice. For starters, if you are the tiny type like yours truly, run for dear life; you cant win that battle. If there’s no way of running away and of course she’s overpowering you, just play dead and trust me she’ll leave alone cus she’ll think you are unconscious or even dead. Fighting back will only get yo a** whooped a proper one and you’ll be left feeling like a tractor run you over.
- Make sure there’s something unique about you and thats why the man wants you and not her. You cant be basic and expect me(missus) not to feel wounded. Even if you are a few extras, it’ll still hurt but it’ll hurt more if you are just basic.
- Make sure you are not friends with the missus; the betrayal is even worse if you are friends or acquaintances
As for the missus;
Let them know that you know what they are up to. Then sit back and strategize on how to deal with them. Beating her up or scalding her shouldn’t be some of the strategies though; be smart. Besides, how many women will you fight in the name of protecting your man? ME: I love myself too much, that might man might as well fight for me by zipping up, emotionally or otherwise. In case you are wondering, there’s physical and emotional cheating or even both; story for another day.
Have a cheat free week 😉
Hear this, White Fairy stories start with once upon a time. Black Fairy stories start with, yo, you are not going to believe this. True or false? Anyway, I am starting mine the white way though its a Kenyan/Worldwide story. So, sometimes back someone asked for my help and after I slept on it, I offered to help. Few days after, they needed the same help to be constant; twice or thrice a week. I was taken aback and my money loving self got an idea…Why dont I charge for this help? Can you believe that?! We haggled over this help and out of frustration they asked me to keep money out of it.
At the back of my mind I told myself, fair enough, no more money is going to be mentioned anywhere. However in my physical self *chuckles*, I asked them, whats in it for me? So we(I) came up with a plan where both of us would benefit from each other and at the end of the day, everyone goes home happy. We are yet to make use of the devised plan and to tell you the truth, I dont even know if I want to go through with it.
The weeks that followed had me thinking how we have been accustomed to scratch my back I scratch yours it is ridiculous. Sometimes back I helped someone in their time of need and I didnt even charge them a cent for whatever. Few years later, I was in the same predicament they were in previously and of course I expected them to help me as a way of returning the favor. They did come through but it was short lived; it came with a few conditions that I religiously followed but it didnt end well. Needless to say *Chuckles*(I have always wanted to use this phrase), yes we see eye to eye but the relationship is obviously strained.
Where were we? We all know that part of the Bible(sorry for y’all who dont subscribe to this school of thought though I know, you have a similar one) where we are supposed to help but our right hand should not know what our left hand is doing. However, it is human nature to want to get help(returning favor) from someone we had helped. Trust you me most people help because they know at some point they’ll need this same person to chip in when needed. It is alright to want help from them but it is not alright to make it sound like its your right.
We’ll lend money to our friends cus at some point, they should come through for us. We babysit because at sometime, they should babysit for us. We do practically everything because the same help should come through for us at some point. Is it ok to expect the help right back? Yes and No. Yes because we are humans and we wont mind the help(favor) if it comes through. No because, they might not be in a position to help at that particular time. Unless of course this person is used to asking for favors all the time and when it is time to return them even once they vanish into the thin air. There’s only a thin line between being nice and being carried for a fool. Some people are users and they’ll exploit your good nature to the last drop of your blood.
I know I have said that we should learn to expect less from humans but we can only do so for so long. We all need affection and kindness from our fellow humans at some point. All I am saying is, be open to everything; that the help might come from your buddies or family, or it might come from a complete stranger. Either way, dont hold grudges that it didnt come from where you expected; just forgive them. Easier said than done, HUH?!
CHEERS TO THE NEW MONTH 😉