What are you doing about domestic violence as an individual?

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It is exactly 1:15 a.m. in the wee hours of a Monday morning and no I am not insomniac; I have my days though but it is a once in a while kinda thing. So, why am up this very late or very early in the morning depending on how you look at the situation? So, someone tried meeting their Maker this evening but I have a feeling January still wants her here cus we are all in this Njaaanuary misery together. Why would anyone want to die in such a painful manner you ask?   I am glad you asked; they had a fight with le hubby and she thought the best way to get back at him is by committing suicide. So, they were fighting from the bedroom of course and the heat became too much so they decided to take it to the back balcony. After the final punch, nigga goes back to the bedroom and the missus decides to hang herself.

What I don’t understand is how or where she got the rope to hang herself or she had been harboring suicidal thoughts all along and she waited for the perfect moment to execute her perfect plan. Unfortunately the universe had better plans cus someone saw her just in the nick of time and called for help and who better to come for help than le hubby himself. Out of panic he just cut the rope without a second thought and the missus came tumbling down from the second floor to a hard verandah where passersby helped to remove the rope from her neck and rushed her to the hospital.

This happened too fast and I only got the full information waaaaaay after she had been rushed to the hospital. However, I had heard the whole commotion though all along I thought I was dreaming cus I had taken some tablets ( a girl been nursing a mild flu and these tablets are sleep inducing) . Then again, I thought they were muggers and she got caught up in the mayhem since I heard her say,  “Mwangi nitoe kamba” (“Mwangi please remove the rope from my neck”)after a loud scream. I am one very angry person right now because I am supposed to be seated at my desk at work at 8 in the morning and I am here jotting this down because, insomnia happened. Had those people not messed up my sleep I would not be here writing this trying to beg sleep to come.

Someone joked that getting married nowadays is like driving past the Salgaa blackspot cus it is anytime you meet your Maker. We all laughed at the not so funny joke but this is very true; if people are not committing suicide from marital frustrations, le husbands or the wives are killing them in cold blood. Every new day there’s a case of a husband killing his wife or a husband killing the whole family and then committing suicide. And this is just a scratch on the surface since the ones we see on TV or read from the newspapers are the few cases that get media coverage. What about those ones that happen in the middle of Shomakhokho (sp) or in the interiors of Turkana County and no one came forward to report or bring it to the media’s attention?

The saddest thing is that we have normalized this whole thing; we just rant on Facebook for a few days or Twitter typing RIP and later go back to our lives like sh*t didn’t go down.  Not a day passes without a domestic violence case being reported or being aired on TV or Radio; if you ask me, the situation is getting out of hand. The fast we get the situation sorted, the better because the number of children being left orphaned is increasing.  I mean orphaned cus, when one parent kills the other and the remaining parent ends up in jail for murder, aren’t those kids practically orphans cus none of their parents is in their lives? Let us not even talk about the resulting emotional damage in the poor kids. Let us not even talk about how the poor kids will end up in cruel hands of relatives and when poop hits the fan and they cant take it anymore, they end up in streets being muggers and all sorts of nuisance to the society and later maybe felled by a bullet.

Out of all this I have concluded that most people are frustrated with life and what better way to deal with their frustration than to mete it on their spouses. It is too bad that the children and the rest of the extended family are caught up in the mayhem.

So, what are you doing about the situation? Most of us will just sit comfortably in our office chairs or wherever it is that you work and blame the victim for days on end on why they didn’t run when the spouse started emotional abuse. But have you been to Kilimani mums lately or have you been on these Facebook streets and read how most humans will blame the victim? Y’all ask stupid questions about what they did to deserve such a beating or why the husband arranged for her to be raped and later her body doused in acid? Others say she was a mpango wa kando and she deserved it cus she’s a home wrecker and all sorts of BS that irk me from here to kingdom comes. Other people will urge the woman to stay on since he was a first time offender and the good book says we should forgive and blah blah blah….

Lest y’all forget, not a day passes without someone attacking single mothers (calms your titties, this is not about single mums only) and how they cannot keep a man. Those single mothers you are out there bad mouthing loved themselves and the lives of their kids more than they loved the idea of marriage. They loved their sanity more than the title Mrs. I am still single and hoping to get married someday but this Salgaa joke is starting to get me scared cuss h*t is true! Knowing that there’s only a very thin line between love and hate and life and death makes me wanna spend the rest of my life loving my son and I.

You get married to a psycho you are doomed, you choose to remain single for sanity’s sake, you cant live in peace courtesy of married humans who think marriage is the alpha and omega of this life. THERE’S JUST NO WINNING IN THIS LIFE!  So, where was I? I was saying, the society still considers one a failure if they cant sustain a marriage and this is especially blamed on women. It is even sadder that it is women who keep slut shaming fellow women for not sticking in an abusive relationship. The man is always a saint in most women’s eyes and it must be le wife who was a problem in the said relationship.

If y’all cant stand each other, what is easier, walking away or receiving daily death threats? Or watching your kids slowly get emotionally damaged every time y’all throwing punches and cooking pans in the house. Y’all need to choose your lives as opposed to a silly title that might cost you your life and that of your kids; you can live without the said spouse cus you were still living even before they became a part of your life. Forget the marriage vows, heaven will understand; I am sure that is why you have wisdom to know when to walk away and when to stick around.

If it is not working why don’t you just walk away before it is too late? Don’t listen to those saying marriage needs patience and tolerance, I don’t know kuvumilia when the said person keeps on saying they will kill you one day. As much as the good book says love is tolerant, I don’t believe in ‘treating’ black eyes cus someone made me their punching bag or washing my pillow cases daily from daily tears, hell nah! There’s better to life than daily tears from a person who’s not even related to you by blood.

Y’all need to love yourselves, something we never get to grasp. When you love yourself so much, you will find it hard to put up with some of these things. And I know y’all rolling your eyes saying I should get married first then I can talk about marriage. I have been on this earth long enough to know things I can never put up with and the ones I can tolerate. They say when you know your value, you will learn to treat yourself better and demand better treatment from others; men and women. We all know even women are not saints and they have also driven their husbands to their death plunges.

So, know what works for you and what you can’t put up with. Also, before you put that rope around your neck because a your spouse said or did 1,2,3 things, have you thought about how your kids will live after you are dead. Before you pull that trigger or throw that punch that will send them to their Maker, have you thought about your kids? Of course you didn’t, cus y’all too selfish to think about others (story for another day).

What is the church doing about domestic violence nowadays?  What are you doing as a church group leader? Do people still attend pre-marital classes organized by churches? As a church leader, do you arrange for marriage seminars every now and then? Do you have a marriage counselor in church where troubled couples can walk in without the fear or exorbitant charges they might need to fork out? Are you turning away single parents away cus they are not a complete family?

Does your school turn away kids from single parent homes cus they don’t come from a complete family and they might ‘infect’ the other with whatever? What are you doing as an individual about domestic violence? Just sitting there bad mouthing your neighbor and making sure they know how much of a failure they are cus they cant keep their marriage together? What are you doing as the married person in that violent relationship? Do you have a hand in enabling it continue by staying on hoping they will change?

What are doing as a law enforcement officer when someone reports a domestic violence case? Do you make fun of their misery? Do you accept bribes from the abuser so that you can release them? Do you issue P3 forms as fast as possible or do you first ask for a bribe before you can issue it? What are you doing as a doctor treating the domestic violence victim? Do you accept bribes from the abuser to get them off the hook by writing what they want you to write? You know by doing that you are enabling the abuser to continue doing it, right?

As a parent, when your daughter comes back to your house after a series of abuses, do you make them feel like a failure? Do you make them feel like a burden to you? Did you push them to get married to that person cus they were monied and your selfish needs came before the needs of your child. Do you keep accepting bribes from your son-in-law every time your daughter comes home after being abused and you still allow her to go back to the slaughter house she calls a marriage?  Do you listen to your in-laws more than you listen to your child? Do you keep telling your daughter to put up since you also put up with it and you are still alive as they can see?

What are the Women Reps doing about domestic violence, women MPs, women leaders at large? The rate at which things are escalating, domestic violence should be declared a national disaster or there should be state of emergency about the same.THIS IS GETTING OUT OF HAND!

What is your contribution in all this domestic violence issue? What are you doing about it? These are the million dollar questions we all need to answer and maybe, just maybe, we will have better homes and an even happier society. I still don’t understand why Uhuru Kenyatta didn’t create a Happiness Ministry and get us a CS for that post. It’d have come in handy now that we are all employing our spouses to make us happy.

Also, this is not how I had imagined my first post of 2018 will be but eeer, somebody gotta put it out there, right? And this post was signed off at 3:15 a.m, I am now sleepy.



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God has your back
A child jumping into their dad’s arms cus he will catch them

I don’t know how to make it sound like a sigh of ‘it’s been quite some time since we were here* but we are back here now. I know I need to up my consistency game cus lets face it, I cant be consistent to save my neck. Anyway, I trust you have been well and I’m going to try and be consistent for the next few weeks even if it is the only thing I’ll accomplish before the year ends. I will try and do two posts per week, so help me God!

So, sometimes back I went for a team building event never mind we don’t work in the same company; it was the first time I met some of those people, well, minus the event organizers. There were many activities but one event got me thinking the other day and it was the inspiration behind this post. We were grouped into three and two people were to stand facing each other while the middle one would have their back to one of the two..Does it make sense though   😀 ?

The catch was to have the middle one swing back and forth; completely letting themselves go hoping the person behind or the person in front would catch them lest they fall. The other catch was to have your eyes closed, your hands across your chest and not move your foot in front to act as a balance; just let yourself go and the other person will catch you.

I was my turn to be in the middle and no matter how much I tried to let myself go cus I knew the other person would be there to catch me, I just could not. I would either open my eyes or I will put my feet in such a way that I’ll still support myself by the time I am landing in their arms. For starters, this behavior is for a person with trust issues, hahaha! Secondly, this is a person who still wants to be in control even after being assured that there is a person or persons in control.

So the other day I remembered that team building event and I realized how we don’t trust God will work out things for us even after He has assured us over and over again He will not let out feet slip. He has told us over and over again not to be afraid but we will pray and still try to take control over things. We are all human and we will still want to have our hands on stuff just to make sure things go well but maybe its time we let go of our fears. Its time we let God take control and just wait for things to work out cus eventually they will work at some point.

So, trust God and lean not on your own understanding; God has your back, quite literally! Just surrender and let Him work out things for you. You prayed in faith that things will work out, just trust that your prayers were heard and at His appointed time, things will definitely work out.

It’s time to take my own advice cus I worry too much!

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Plain Jane is my other name

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I am writing this with a very heavy heart; my tiny heart cannot hold this disappointment anymore. The glam gods don’t want me anywhere near their clique! As in my face can’t hold make up for a whole day without me looking like I have been stung by bees, arrgh! Yaaani, one hour after applying makeup I’ll start having a tingling feeling and before I know it, I am looking for water or wet wipes to wipe the darn thing off. Mind you, I don’t like lots of products on my face cus the cakey feeling/look just wears my face off. My face just feels heavy and stuff.

For a few times I’d blame the sun, I’d blame the product but the other day I just realized I am meant to be a plain Jane all my life; just like the good Lord had intended. I rarely buy make up; the only item I ever bought was a compressed powder and trust me its been years. That compressed powder has seen better days. I am actually considering trashing it. The other make-up item was a Maybelline compressed powder that was actually a free gift, eeh the love of freebies might be the end of me one day. Some of you might remember a post I had made about a lotion that was threatening to de-melanin me; the Maybelline compressed powder came with it. The lipstick, I guess I pinched from my friend or my mother’s friend gave it to me; i just cant remember.  I have dark eye circles and its not that I don’t get enough sleep; I just don’t know why they want to make me look old before my actual old age comes. So I ask a friend to give me some concealer to put on my dark circles cus I was feeling a little playful; I was just in a good mood. I put on the concealer and applied some compressed powder to complete the look. I am looking all glammed up and stuff; I have a slightly pink/purple lippie and I could not get enough of myself.

Infact I went ahead and asked for the price of the concealer so that I can buy mine and stop borrowing make-up. She mentioned the price and my jaw fell down; I couldn’t believe that tiny thing was going for almost 2K. Maybe its not even much money but my penny pinching self finds it a bit too much. Anyhow, I am going through the day, admiring my face, working; practically minding my own business and then I realize my face is feeling a bit swollen. So I start moving my face muscles and it occurs to me my face is actually swollen on the areas I had applied the concealer.I ran to the washroom and cleaned my face and applied Vaseline.

I just sat there and complained to the owner of the concealer and made up my mind I’ll never apply anything close to make-up on my face ever again! Lets not even start with weaves and wigs; story for another day. So, if you see me with blemishes all over, dark circles and stuff, just understand the make-up gods don’t want me anywhere near them. I’ll just remain a plain Jane just like the good Lord had intended it. Besides, it is the inner beauty that matters, right?! Yah! I am fearfully and wonderfully made 🙂

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Cheers to the New Month

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Do you remember that time you ordered something from Jumia, or Kilimall or even Amazon? How many times did you order the same item? Once, right? Also, that time you went to that restaurant and ordered a meal, how many times did you order the same meal, I suppose it is once. You definitely sat pretty like a good person cus you knew it’ll come any way. You didn’t keep on bugging the online shop personnel or that waiter because you knew it’s just a matter of time and you’ll have your whatever.  So what happens when you pray about something and you have to keep on praying about the same thing over and over again? Isn’t that like bugging your Maker? I know the good book says He’ll never get tired of us going back to Him but a soul can only take too much. This kind of nagging shows Him how small your faith is.

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Praying/asking for something over and over again doesn’t make it come quickly; what matters is the amount of faith you have. Pray once and then start thanking Him cus you know it’s just a matter of time and you’ll have your prayer request honored. No one likes an entitled spoilt brat as their child; that’s why you feel offended when your child or your friend makes you feel like it’s their right when you do something for them. Same case happens with God and with the Universe; be thankful and you’ll have even more than you bargained for.

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I may not be where I want to be but I have learnt that praying and waiting patiently without complaining is better than nagging and obsessing over it. Have positive vibes that at the right time, you’ll get what you have been patiently waiting. Start acting like you already have it and you’ll be surprised of how easy and fast it is to get what you want.  Faking it till you make it has never had a better meaning

So, start this month with gratitude; for all that you have and all that you are expecting.

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The other day one of my colleagues was to take us on a road trip, Shi and I, well, he was also part of the road trip. He however decided to bring along his crush which was ok with me until Shi pointed out how awkward that would be. I thought to myself, mmhhh, come to think of it, it’ll be awkward. Any who, it was already late and I couldn’t backtrack on my decision since he had asked if I was ok with it and I had said yes.. The D-day is here, we meet, we get to the car, awkwardness is already setting in and we are wondering how much we would ENDURE before we get to our destination. I guess the universe heard/saw our dissatisfaction because the car developed problems even before we left Nairobi County. And we happily exited from the car; eeeh, how sadistic can we get?

Same weekend on Sunday I pop into this salon after church cus my hair needed some TLC. Salons in my hood don’t need you to make an appointment, so you just pop in and have your hair done. This particular day though, everyone was busy and she decided to get me someone else to do my hair. I had to go to her salon to have my hair done. My hair is washed and blow dried and as we all know, once someone else comes in, your plaiting has to wait as she gets this easy money. Any-who, I don’t have an issue so long as it is one client; not 20 clients and yours truly has to wait. Anyway, as I wait for this client to be served, this salonist’s 4 year old daughter is being groomed to be a salonist and she decides yours truly will be her human mannequin. I sit there silently even as my head is being turned right, left and center and since I am a nice person, I let this baby practice. Any-who, she’s threatening to leave me with a broken neck and I nicely tell her to stop.. She throws a tantrum, I kid you not! Anyway, I stand my ground and she ends up sleeping out of anger.

People pleasers or is it people pleasing is a bad disease you know. We never realize we are pleasing people until we have already done it too many times, or until someone points it out. You realize I didn’t say no to my colleague bringing his crush along as much as it was supposed to be the three of us. Do you know why I might have said yes, because I didn’t want him to think I am a meanie, I didn’t want him to feel like I am selfish and stuff. I didn’t want him to say he’s changed his mind if his crush can’t tag along; beggars are not choosers J. Why didn’t I say not to the kid threatening to break my neck? I didn’t want to break her heart.



You see why we say yes to please people; for love, validation, favors (just in case we need something from them at some point). I am naturally a nice person J and I am too soft as well, so sometimes I’ll just agree to do something even though it’ll inconvenience me. Other times I’ll say no but the guilt that will eat me up is just on another level. I can’t decide whether my neediness has a lot to do with it but I am trying to understand myself as time goes by. Someone says I am quite needy, hahaha! I don’t know about that but I am trying to enjoy my own company as days go by, damn! This age thing is coming with a lot of wisdom; the things I’ve learnt since I turned a year older this year are much more than I have ever learnt in my entire life! Story for another day J



Can you say no to people pleasing? Yes, you can. How can you do that?

By knowing that you have a choice; yes, you have a choice, you have a freaking choice! You don’t have to say yes to everything. I know making that choice is the hardest but once you say no, more than once, you’ll get the hang of it. Just say no if you cant help on whatever, kesi baadaye( explanations later)

Think it over: Once someone asks for a favor, don’t blurt out a yes even before a second thought. I have this tendency of saying yes even before I think much about it. Of course once you give a yes, you are done for! There’s no going back. So ask for some time to think about it although once someone tells me they’ll get back to me, it translates into a no in not so many words. Whatever the case, after much thought you’ll know if you are in a position to agree to it or not

Love yourself! I can’t emphasize on this; I am still a long way into loving myself but I am making some good steps. We all know this validation seeking is because we don’t love ourselves enough and we think some external love will do us a lot of good. Unfortunately this external love does us more harm than good. By the time we realize what is happening, we are more damaged than we were before it came along. Put yourself first, love yourself so much until people start terming it as being selfish or being self centred.

Don’t give explanations as to why you cant: Once you start explaining yourself on why you cant, believe you me you’ll find yourself deep in. Some people just have a way of arm twisting you and being the nice you, you cant uncoil yourself from their pinky finger. You end up pleasing them at the expense of your happiness/sanity. Say no until you say what you are getting yourself into. As I said, it is OK to say no

Even the Bible says love your neighbor as you love yourself; yaani, love yourself first so that you can love your neighbor. By doing so, you don’t have to put up with people’s shenanigans so that they can give love in return..










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Forgive even before they apologize

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They say the only two honest people on this earth are a drunkard and a child below 8 years; when they get to nine, they are already mini-adults. Well, ‘honesty’ for a drunken person is just an act of cowardice because they are not bold enough to say it as it is. Ask a child about what they feel about an outfit and they will tell you if it is smart or bland. They might not give the exact details but if they said it is not good, trust me it is not. The beauty about kids is that they’ll always say it as it is; they are better than your friends who will never tell you a certain dress doesn’t look on you. So, if you have a child that tells you someone has not been nice to them, trust them, they can’t make that up.

This is not so much about honesty but about forgiveness; I know that escalated fast. Anyway, we all get into nasty word fights with our friends, partners and well, pretty much anyone we have a relationship with at work or anywhere else. During that heated moment, we are bound to exchange nasty words that leave us so hurt and it only takes the grace of heaven to forget about it. When you get into such an exchange and if you have a chance to walk away, please do, otherwise no amount of apologizing will ever erase the nasty stuff you said.

Saying nasty things to your loved one is not something that comes to you when you start that fight. It is something you’ve entertained in your mind for far too long but you never got a chance of saying it. I read a post on Facebook sometimes back of sisters who got drunk and then started spewing all manner of horrible words to each other. They are uterine sisters (your homework for this week). In that moment of insults and stuff, one of the sisters let’s call her Delilah said the other sister, let’s call her Sarah is ‘dirty blood’ and some other evil stuff. So, Delilah was asking if she should apologize to Sarah since everyone in their family is up in arms that she should apologize.  My issue was not even apologizing but the fact that she had thought about dirty blood in her sister all long even before the alcohol came into the picture. She might apologize and even do a sacrifice to signify how sorry she is but the fact that she said it when drunk means that’s what she’s thought about her all along

Therefore, next time someone says you are ugly or you are fat or you are A, B, C, and D when they are tipsy and then cry foul the next morning, they meant every word they said. That to me is cowardice and it should never be taken lightly. Also, when they say something nasty when you get into a fight and a few weeks/months down the line they decide to apologize and include that line of ‘I didn’t mean to’, they meant exactly what they said.  I’m a firm believer of forgiving even before the wronging party apologizes because it just lessens your burden.

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Accept the apology when they finally decide to apologize and swiftly move on. I’ve been wronged one too many times but the best thing about this soul is that she forgets quickly. However, that does not mean I’ve given you a leeway to step on my toes every damn time. I just don’t have enough space for carrying grudges; they are too heavy.

Peace *insert peace emoji


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Should I use a bark collar?

Should I use a bark collar?

Dogs bark when they are distressed or when they are hungry. Other times they’ll bark for no apparent reason which makes it annoying at times. Some breeds are more prone to barking as compared to others. Whatever the case, the million dollar question is whether you should use a dog collar on your dog. However, before you get a dog collar, you should get to know why your dog is barking. The dog might be genuine sometimes but when it is just whining, a bark collar will come in handy. This site has nice bark collar reviews http://thepalacedog.com/bark-collar-reviews

How does a dog shock collar work?

For starters, shock collars are not a form of punishment; they serve to correct a certain bad behavior and in this case barking. With the time, the dog will learn to associate the uncomfortable stimuli with the unwanted behavior and stop. You need to make sure the collar is approved to make sure the shock does not harm your dog. Most shock collars will have several levels of enforcement such that the unwanted behavior can be dealt with accordingly. Many shock collars produce a beeping sound before the dog starts barking to serve as a warning. If the dog barks anyway, shock will be administered. The beep will also allow you to give a verbal warning to your dog. With the both warnings in place, the dog will refrain from barking.

The dog collar responds to the movement/vibration of your dog’s vocal cords, the collar will produce a beep sound and then go ahead and administer a shock stimulus if and when the dog barks.

Pros and cons of using shock collars


  • You can adjust the settings of your dog’s shock collar to whatever you think is tolerable for your dog. This is music to the ears of those who are still having mixed feelings about the shock collars. Other collars like spray collars are not adjustable making a shock collar your best bet.
  • Shock collars give fast results especially for dogs willing to learn and change. As for stubborn dogs, it might take some time but you’ll still get there.
  • With shock collars, you don’t need to be there to control your dog’s unnecessary barking. Shock collars can also be used as boundary controls as part of a dog wireless fence http://thepalacedog.com/best-wireless-dog-fence/ although you’ll need to train your dog first. If the dog goes beyond the recommended boundary, the shock stimuli will be administered and the dog will go back. However, shock collar or no shock collar, dog should not be left alone for long periods.


  • The shock is not very pleasant as much as it is harmless. Dog trainers recommend using positive reinforcement method of modifying your dog’s behavior in place of negative feedback.
  • Shock collars might instill fear in your dog and instead of progressing, they’ll start retrogressing. For example when using the shock collar as boundary training, the dog might refuse to go out of the house. The dog will fear anything associated with the shock and become withdrawn thus stressing him.
  • Some automatic and electric bark collars might go off intentionally especially those that detect sounds from the outside. This will lead to the dog being punished for other dog’s barks. In such a case, where the dog gets punished for other dog’s barks, the dog might get confused because they don’t understand why they are being punished.

In conclusion, using a dog bark shock collar is not supposed to make you a bad dog parent. Shared training sessions might see you and your dog improving on your relationship. Therefore, get a bark collar for your dog. It keeps your pet disciplined and out of the harm’s way


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To use euthanasia or not

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Yester night I was watching a movie; it is the only movie that almost brought tears into my eyes. Me Before You ….You see how how we check traffic on one side of the road while we are on phone, that’s how this guy got hit by one and he was paralyzed for the next 2 and a half years.  He used to be an adrenalin junkie, scuba diving, ice skating et.al but after this accident, he could only reminisce on his past.He was in and out of depression. He was confined to a wheel chair and he became totally dependent; had to move back to his parent’s house who hired a doctor and a minder (nanny).

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A still picture from “Me before you”

As usual, his girlfriend was the first to abandon him, and then his best friend could not wait to get his hands on her (typical of humans and particularly men). And they had the nerve to come and visit him; poor soulL.  Anyway, with time everyone other than his family abandoned him. Good thing is that his family was wealthy and he was fully catered for. He was always in a bad mood; never smiled for a long time until this pretty minder who desperately needed a job came on board and he was happy again. They ended up falling in love and toured some exotic places just to cheer him up. It was his mother’s idea to bring in someone pretty and chatty to get him out of depression and to convince him not to end his life. Yes, he had considered having euthanasia cus he was constantly in pain. Unfortunately this pretty lady whose name was Lou as she liked calling herself didn’t succeed and after a painful denial she let go off him and he died a happy man. He left her a good fortune of his life’s savings.

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One of the quotes from the movie

Why am I going on and on about this sad love story? If you had an option, would you rather your loved one went through with euthanasia or let nature take its course? I know death is considered a taboo in our continent but the rate at which terminal illnesses and road accidents are sending people to their early graves, maybe euthanasia can be considered as an option. As much as death is inevitable, no one likes talking about it. Even when someone is on their deathbed and it’s clear they will not make it out alive, we still want to hold on to hope that they will make it. It is ok to hope against hope but sometimes the pain is too much both for the patient and their family and mercy killing or pulling them off life support machine is the only way to lessen the pain for both parties. However, euthanasia is not allowed in Kenya; the Kenyan law prohibits anyone from knowingly, intentionally or directly causing death to another person. Maybe medics can take up the issue with law makers and just maybe, the burden of taking care of terminally ill might be lessened; for both the government and the affected families. Most western countries have adopted euthanasia especially if someone has been dependent on life support machine for quite some time. It is also allowed to end a child’s life if they have a terminal illness or they were born with a condition that will see them to the grave before a certain age.

Euthanasia is a debate that has been discussed over and over again and people will always agree to disagree. Some people will argue with Bible verses of how life should only be ended by our Maker which is alright cus he’s the Giver of life (save for atheists); but I’ll always love how people quote the Bible when it suits them. Other people will argue that there’s no point in letting a person suffer under your watch and you can do something to lessen their pain. Terminal illnesses are hard both for the family and the patient whether emotionally, physically or economically. Some illnesses leave the family literally begging for essentials despite them having medical covers. These illnesses exhaust the medical cover; eat up the family’s life savings, call for medical fundraisers and unfortunately the patient still passes on. its sad to see your loved one suffer and not know how to relieve the pain. It’s even sadder when they pass on.

To use euthanasia or not is like being caught between a rock and a hard place; you are damned if you do and damned if you don’t.

Would you pull off your loved one from life support machine? Would you allow them go through with euthanasia if that was their wish? Would you consider euthanasia if your loved one cant make that decision either cus they are mentally unfit or they have been in a comma for far too long? Do you think euthanasia should be allowed in all countries? What do you think about euthanasia?

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Lose blacks and dull colours:embrace bright colours

The other day, I was to put on a white dress and a purple top. I put them together the previous night but I was too lazy to iron in the evening. So, I decide I’ll iron in the morning; morning comes and I wake up a little late which means I can’t iron. Besides, the white dress needed me to put on specific heels and I just didn’t have the energy to walk in them.  So I rummage my closet and I settled on a yellow dress; a good choice cus I didn’t need to iron it and the heels I was to pair it with are quite comfortable.  Sigh! Does anyone else hate ironing like me? I try as much as possible not to get something that will need ironing all the time. Ironing saps the life out of me.

Anyway, I noticed on this particular day I was in good moods the whole day. I couldn’t help feeling beautiful (notice I didn’t use pretty J) and radiant. In fact someone asked me what I had in the morning cus my spirits were so high. I’ll teach you something today, never tell anyone that they are looking pretty cus it means they are attractive yes but they are not really beautiful. We have this inside joke with my friend Shi *chuckles* of calling each other pretty, hahhahaha!

Anyway, maybe some of you have no idea how colors play a very important role in our lives. It’s color that draws you to a certain dress, a product, a certain brand and so many other things. Colors have the power to control our emotions, yes they do. Let’s look at colors in depth;

Warm colors (yellow, orange and red)

Warm colors have a way of bringing out happiness and feelings of energy. I wonder why people insist on putting on black to a funeral when it’s already sad enough.

  • Yellow

Try putting on yellow on that day you wake up feeling like you are carrying the whole universe on your shoulders. It might not solve your problems but it’ll raise your moods. Yellow is the color associated with new ideas; it helps in finding new ideas of doing things. Yellow has the ability to awaken optimism and greater confidence. However, too bright yellow might stress you up especially if you are going through a difficult transition in your life. Therefore, get the right yellow that does not irritate your eyes J

  • Orange

Orange is a combination of yellow and red; it enhances playfulness. It enhances a feeling of vitality as well as happiness just like yellow. Orange can be aggressive but it is quite friendly an inviting. It shows movement but with a less overpowering effect. Orange uplifting and we should strive to find a way to incorporate it in our daily lives. Don’t do too much orange; a top (blouse or camisole), a bracelet or a hair band is just fine. Put on color orange when you want to be ‘the life’ in the office.

  • Red

Red has been associated with many things; passionate, sexy as well as the color for showing danger. Red is a physical stimulant which means it ignites action as well as enhances a speedy response. Ever wondered why most lingerie is red? For speedy ignition as well as response. Red is a powerful color and too much of it results into an overkill. So, stick to small doses of red like nail polish, lipstick, and shoes and if you are in full red, break it with other colors like yellow and black.

Cool colors (green, purple and blue)

Cool colors are calming as well as soothing but they can also be used to express sadness; Purple sparks creativity.  Green is easy on eyes and the eyes can stay there for longer. As for blue; it is so calming. This color causes the body to create some chemicals that evoke a calming feeling. Wondered why Twitter and Facebook used blue as their brand colors? Cus blue gives a friendly feel and a more relaxing feel.

So, lose black and all dull clothes from your closet and you’ll experience a shift on your moods. Get yourself colored and flowered outfits and become girly all over again.

Let me give you a few ideas on some colors that should find their way into your closet.




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Heaven manenos

If we make it to heaven at the end of time, life will great!!! There will be no hustle of prepping food and doing dishes, we’ll just be scooping honey from the rivers and on our way back, we’ll be plucking fruits from all the trees..It will be raining milk and we’ll just be standing in the rain with our cups waiting for them to fill and while at it we’ll be licking the one that will be dripping from our faces….Too bad for your’s truly cus she has lactose intolerance 🙁

Once milk rain is over we will be going to the rivers that actually have clear water and well swim with the fish as they nibble on our toes and the rest of the body as a way of massaging us. We’ll be lying in the green pastures to dry, as we bask in the sunset.

Every evening it will be dancing time and thereafter it will be sleeping time. And we’ll live happily ever after…


Forgive before they apologize

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